What Matters Most

Oh hey, 2018.


What a crazy year, 2017 was. I know I’m not the only one who feels that way. You’ve got people who experienced so many different milestones in their life. People were either fighting for segregation or coming together to fight mutually shared obstacles. So many personal struggles were broadcasted through social media. So many people felt personally offended by others. So much love and hate was spread. So much violence and sexual assault was brought to our attention.

We witnessed powerful acts in 2017. Regardless of how you feel about the year, everyone can agree that it was powerful.

I took a brief hiatus from my blogging, I’m sure you were all wondering where the hell I went. Especially when I was enjoying it so much. There was just so many things I wasn’t able to share at that time, that I can finally share now!

I made the decision in October to step out of my shadow and try something new. The great thing about pushing yourself and seeing what you can do is that 1 of two things can happen. You either succeed (and then, WOW! talk about a self esteem boost), or you fail (and now you know what you need to work on). I had the privilege of interviewing for over a month for a company in Atlanta, GA. I completed several rounds of phone and video interviews, completed several projects, and was flown down there to meet their team in November. I was offered the job the following week. The position was with a video marketing group, working as a project manager.

Obviously – I have ZERO experience in this. Which I made 100% crystal clear. After busting my ass to complete things (after a LOT of google research, like.. really – wtf is a production booklet? a storyboard? HELP ME GOOGLE!), nailing my interviews, falling in love with their team… I was offered the job, and declined.

Yep – you read that right, I declined the position.

This was not me testing the waters to see if I was capable of reaching outside of veterinary/human healthcare… this was not me yanking around a company’s chain for my own personal satisfaction. I was not on a mission to make myself feel better. I honestly did not thing I would be offered the job, and I told myself that even if I wasn’t – what an amazing opportunity to branch out and try something new.

I declined the position for lack of flexibility with pay. Over the last year and the things I’ve had to go through in my career I’ve learned one thing that stands out. It is EXTREMELY important to KNOW YOUR WORTH. If you’re unhappy with the dollar amount that’s being offered to you, ALWAYS negotiate. If a company is unwilling to negotiate, walk away. Really though, WALK AWAY. The most power you will ever have when you are offered a job is the initial process once it’s been offered to you – after that… who knows what happens.

Not an easy decision. I had already contacted and filled out an apartment application, contacted family members once the ticket/hotel was booked for me to go down there… My lease in Seattle was ending the week of Thanksgiving… everything was just pushing me to this point of – shit or get off the pot.

But I chose to stay. So here I am, still in Seattle.

I wrapped up the quarter with a 98.05% in my psych class. Beating myself up for not getting 100%… but sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. I’ll choose to look at this as a winning scenario. I managed to work full time, plus my side jobs, AND kick ass in my class. So… cheers to that, girlfriend.

I was in a deep sadness watching so many of my close friends move away this summer. I had an overwhelming feeling of loneliness that kept me so shut off and introverted I had a hard time recognizing myself while getting ready in the mornings. I have taken that sadness and turned it into something I can work with. I reached out and have managed to make and maintain new friendships. If I’m staying in Seattle another year, I better make some damn good girlfriends while I’m at it.


I’ve been able to make some incredible memories with this shining diamond right here. Butter & Todd’s future BA veterinarian, miss Audrey. What a difference she has made in my life. We met while working at a veterinary clinic together while she was home from Vet School 3 years ago. After I lost my job at the clinic, we became even closer. She is my red wine & magic pizza babe and I am so blessed to be friends with her.


This sassy girl…. how lucky did I get when she stalked me on facebook to let me know I left my debit card at her coffee stand… and then me, in all my awkwardness replies, “thanks, wanna be friends?” – the rest is history. It’s rare to meet someone you look at and go, “WTF.” to everything they say, because they’re a mirror image of yourself. Laughing over so many of the same experiences and mistakes we’ve made while having a blast and spending too much money on shit we don’t need. You are an AWESOME surprise and I am SO glad my coffee stand girl crush on you turned into one of the best friends I’ve got here in washington! ❤


Ooooooh. Lil. Lil. Lil. Lil. WTF would I do without you? Within 48hrs of starting my new job you had already friend requested me on Facebook. You enrich my life SO much. I have learned a ridiculous amount from you in the short time we have been friends. You are magical. I couldn’t imagine a better desk buddy or classy girls night partner in crime. Thanks for supporting me in all the decisions I make and listening to all my dating/family/friend drama. You are seriously sunshine on my otherwise cloudy days. ❤


Sometimes we make friends who we don’t get to see very often, but when you do, it’s worth the wait! Tay tay, Totty, and Whit – so happy I was able to spend time with you ladies as we close up 2017. So proud of everything y’all have accomplished! Taylor moving off to Sacramento and pursuing her dreams of being a veterinarian… Tess – holy crap, you’re pregnant! Couldn’t be more excited for Baby Barkley. And Whitney – I’m so glad you continue to call me for last minute Toaster sleepovers. I look forward to our get togethers more than you know and I miss working with you so much! ❤


Cheers to so many new and old friends. What an odd group of kids who all came together just because I asked them to. Meeting Sam & Tyler and having them open my eyes to some shit I had been unable to lift the fog from – I will be eternally grateful. Mollie (and I guess Jan, too) – I’m so happy to see you with someone who loves and adores you, you deserve it! I can’t believe how much you’ve grown since I met you so many years ago when we both worked together at VCA. Marissa – I’m going to miss you so much, but I’m also SO excited for you to start your new career! Ebony – on your way to the sunshine, you have opened my eyes to a new way of thinking and I am so grateful to have you as a friend!


And last but certainly not least, the best Christmas present I’ve had in YEARS! B – I am SO proud of you and everything you have accomplished. It’s hard to believe we just celebrated out 11yr “friendiversary” on New Years Eve. If there’s one dude I can count on other than my papa – it’s you. Thank you for such a fun week and I can’t wait to see you again soon!


I was so spoiled with all these wonderful people during my blogging hiatus. My cup is literally so full it’s spilling over with love. Sitting back and looking around I am more grateful than ever for my home in Seattle, the incredible friends I am making and the distances people are willing to travel to come see me.

While there is still a lot of adventure barreling towards me in 2018… I am more prepared than ever to handle anything that gets thrown at me.

Let’s do the damn thing.


P.S. – To Nina, Ilana & Cara — don’t think I love you any less because I didn’t post a picture of you on here or give you a shout out. I was simply enjoying the new friends I have made since this summer & loving on those who came to visit this holiday season. You guys know I love you. ❤

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